The excitement, stress, and anticipation of having a baby are (ideally) not frequently experienced on a high school campus. English Teachers Sanjit Roy and Ginger Roy, however, are in a season of their lives that is full of all the aforementioned emotions and more, as they continue on their journey to have a baby through a surrogacy process.
Although the initial years of their marriage were dedicated to caring for G. Roy’s children, S. Roy always had a desire to have children of his own. Because this longing for his own children never ceased, the two of them began to look into surrogacy agencies, S. Roy said.
“When we got married, I knew she didn’t have the ability to have any more children, and I was content that I would be the best father-like figure to her children,” S. Roy said. “Just recently though, now that our kids are older, we’ve kind of started thinking more about it as a real possibility.”
The surrogate process has hefty costs, but it is an option taken by many couples, such as the Roys, who are unable to conceive.
“Because I don’t have any eggs, we have an egg donor […] and then we have a gestational carrier, who is someone who is not biologically related to the baby, but she’s the person who carries the baby — gives birth to the baby,” G. Roy said. “Mr. Roy is actually the biological father.”
Currently, the surrogate mother has successfully received an embryo and is now pregnant, according to G. Roy. Other embryos are frozen in the case of complications and the need to try again, G. Roy added.
“We did a lot of testing, like genetic screening, so we got to pick whether we wanted a boy or a girl. And they were all rated on how good the eggs were,” S. Roy said. “We wanted a girl, and so […] we picked the best girl. Sometimes people put in more than one egg, but we did not want any chance with twins so we just did one embryo.”
Due to complications in the surrogate process, the Roys have encountered a few bumps in the road, but they remain excited and determined, G. Roy said. After reading about other successful GoFundMe campaigns, S. Roy established a page to raise awareness.
“I wanted it to be more like, random people who just read our story, and we actually did get a few donations, but we’ve been really just kind of touched mainly by our friends, especially a lot of our coworkers here, and even a few students,” S. Roy said. “It’s been really more emotionally supportive than the financial part, we still have a lot. I think it’s been good.”
Although this journey is an intensely intimate one with a lot of ups and downs accompanying it, the Roys are adamant about maintaining an openness and authenticity about their experiences, according to G. Roy.
“I feel that I’ve always been open about my personal life — I mean I don’t talk about it in class or anything, but I also don’t hide it, and I see my students as real people, […] they can see me as a real person too,” G. Roy said. “That doesn’t damage the learning process at all. It just makes us even closer, on a different level.”
Being open about this sensitive aspect of their lives does come with an amplified emotional toll, but the support they have received has enriched their journey tremendously, S. Roy said.
“We’ve been with our [surrogacy] agency for over a year, and it’s been sort of a long road, and we still have months to go. Our due date right now is December 24th, so it’s going to end up being a process of a few years and a lot of dollars, but it’ll be worth it,” G. Roy said. “We hope our daughter goes to MHS someday.”
