In recent years, teen mental health has become progressively worse. According to the Centers for Disease Control (CDC), there are “approximately 4.4 million children ranging from ages 3-17 who are diagnosed with anxiety in the United States.” Factoring in the prominence of social media, substance abuse, and lack of mental health resources most of today’s youth have grown up with, it is not surprising teen mental health has become as big of an issue as it is now. However, has its growing relevance become noticeable to parents?
I asked several students at Milpitas High School about their parents’ relationship to mental health. Many of the students claimed that parents have built a stigma surrounding issues relating to mental health. In a Zoom interview with Senior Kate Le, she said, “I am grateful to have parents that are more open to talking about mental health, but I understand that many of my friends and peers struggle to do the same. I think that some adults do not prioritize mental health and consider mental health resources as a luxury or privilege (though it is in some cases true). Because of that, this topic might get dismissed, taken lightly, or ignored altogether.”
Another student, who wishes to remain anonymous, shared her experience in opening up to her parents about mental health over a Zoom interview. “My parents view mental health illnesses as something that can be cured. Essentially, (my mother) believes that mental illnesses can easily go away. (My parents) grew up believing that it is not okay to be mentally ill. For example, I tried to explain to my mom that my sister’s depression would not magically go away, but she refused to believe it.” I believe that the denial and lack of empathy that parents react with when hearing their children speak about their emotional and mental state is dangerous.
Most students took the stance that adults struggle with prioritizing teen mental health, which is immensely harmful to teens who are seeking emotional support from their parents. One perspective on the issue is that some parents who dismiss mental health are doing so because of cultural norms. In a Zoom interview, senior Maureen Tanag stated, “In my Asian culture, seeking help is looked down upon and shown in a negative light, even though seeking help is a completely normal and healthy thing to do. It is just like going to the doctors for a check-up,”—and she is completely right.
Often, seeking help can be seen as a sign of weakness by parents, but this stereotype and perspective is something that needs to change. We must normalize parents reaching out to their children and providing them with safe spaces to talk about their feelings.
Several teens also find it uncomfortable to share their emotional well-being with their parents and sometimes are intimidated to ask at all. When asked about whether her parents are emotionally involved, senior Giuliana Samonte wrote in an email interview, “I think that my parents try to be involved and supportive as much as I let them. If I do not mention there is something wrong, I usually show it externally, and my parents see that. When they see it, they usually know right away and just try to be involved by doing something small.”
Another student who chose to remain anonymous over a Zoom interview said, “My parents do not often ask about how I’m doing emotionally; therefore, there is not a chance for them to be supportive. Though if they can visibly tell that something’s up, then they will involve themselves and figure out what’s wrong.” Even the smallest things like getting your child a snack or showing them a sign of physical affection can have an impact on their mood. Today’s youth are in a constant crisis for mental health and require emotional support systems to relieve them of their emotional difficulties.
While it is seemingly nice that parents intervene whenever they see that their child is visibly upset, regularly checking in with your child is also important to ensure that their emotional well-being is healthy.
Considering the rise in teen mental health problems is becoming increasingly worse, parents must learn to be cognizant of these signs and start becoming emotionally present for their children. The first step is to listen to what they have to say and believe them whenever they say that they are struggling.
